I've never had many women "friends". I've chatted with many women but not in the sense that we become close friends. My circle has always been very small of women that i talk to. I guess that 'sharing' isn't one of my strongest personality traits. That or i secretly think that no one wants to be friends with an overweight woman...sigh.But that was until i moved here and met Melinda.
She was in my MOPS group and i knew of her, but she sat at another table and so i didn't really get to know her until this move. She's very tall, stunningly beautiful and not a skinny person. But she is truly one of the most beautiful women i have ever seen. Melinda is so, well, dang, i guess stylish is the best word to describe her. She's a size 16, and no matter what she puts on, she's beautiful.
And i think that a lot of that is how she carries herself. Very self confident, very sure of herself, very talented. Which completely confused me...if you wore a size larger than a size 2, were you 'allowed' to be that way? Lord knows that i've never acted like i loved myself like she did. I wanted to rub up against her because i was hoping that some of her would stick to me.
We've become friends. I think that some of the friendships that i've had since moving here were friendships that i felt like i was the only one investing in the friendship. Perhaps that's why it's so difficult to sustain friendships. They take work on both sides, i think, and sometimes, well, i guess life gets in the way.
Melinda also became my Zumba partner at the Y. I can't tell you the difference it made to have her there, even if she did dance so much better than i did. I dance like my legs are tied together, sigh....but it is fun. I can't believe that i enjoy Zumba the way i do.
She's had to stop going to the Y due to medical issues....i, who have no medical issues, of course, think that's my ticket to stop, too. I am hoping that i am going to realize, soon, that this is MY journey and that "I" need to take charge of it.
But, it's really nice to have a friend who i can chat with, share with, and who understands how motherhood, while lots of fun most times, can drive you batty other days. I am hoping to learn from her how to love myself. Not just pretend to love myself, but really love myself. It shouldn't be that hard, should it? Where ever i go, there i am. At the age of 40, i should have learned to become friends with myself...
...and to take care of myself like i am my best friend. Because i deserved that, don't i?
We've become friends. I think that some of the friendships that i've had since moving here were friendships that i felt like i was the only one investing in the friendship. Perhaps that's why it's so difficult to sustain friendships. They take work on both sides, i think, and sometimes, well, i guess life gets in the way.
Melinda also became my Zumba partner at the Y. I can't tell you the difference it made to have her there, even if she did dance so much better than i did. I dance like my legs are tied together, sigh....but it is fun. I can't believe that i enjoy Zumba the way i do.
She's had to stop going to the Y due to medical issues....i, who have no medical issues, of course, think that's my ticket to stop, too. I am hoping that i am going to realize, soon, that this is MY journey and that "I" need to take charge of it.
But, it's really nice to have a friend who i can chat with, share with, and who understands how motherhood, while lots of fun most times, can drive you batty other days. I am hoping to learn from her how to love myself. Not just pretend to love myself, but really love myself. It shouldn't be that hard, should it? Where ever i go, there i am. At the age of 40, i should have learned to become friends with myself...
...and to take care of myself like i am my best friend. Because i deserved that, don't i?
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